tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1205994137019872196.post5477435373185900083..comments2023-10-22T03:14:26.252-07:00Comments on Happy are We: On My MindCarolhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13316877509729026992noreply@blogger.comBlogger11125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1205994137019872196.post-33943247608411849982010-11-08T14:44:05.490-08:002010-11-08T14:44:05.490-08:00Carol, I feel horrible that I've been so wrapp...Carol, I feel horrible that I've been so wrapped up in my own writing that I didn't make the time to see yours. I love this entry and one day, you will, too. I think writing can be so cathartic, especially on subjects like this! It's okay to be feel angry at how he left you, it's okay to still not talk about it without crying, it's not okay to forget and I think you know all that. I was profoundly affected by this blog entry and I think partly because, I too, have lost a father, and also, I think about how much my friend is changing because of her new husband...makes me scared for her children and you exactly touched on what I have feared for all of them. Thank you for sharing your heart with us. Love you.Lesliehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07427139916962549616noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1205994137019872196.post-8150067793767394632010-10-25T14:31:51.332-07:002010-10-25T14:31:51.332-07:00Thank you for sharing! I'm so sorry that you h...Thank you for sharing! I'm so sorry that you had to go through such heartache. Hold on to those good memories. You are such an amazing and talented person! Your dad has to be so proud of you.Jesshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13967738382352704347noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1205994137019872196.post-74002459967223516642010-10-25T13:00:58.820-07:002010-10-25T13:00:58.820-07:00I'm glad you shared and didn't chicken out...I'm glad you shared and didn't chicken out. It is funny how we can write things on our blog that we could never go up and tell our friends.<br /><br />I'm so sorry things ended that way with him. It's so good that you have so many good memories with him and those memories help you to know who he really was, not just his actions for the last few years of his life. Hopefully letting your kids know the grandpa you knew he could be will start to heal some of the wounds. I'm sure he would've wanted that and for you to know he loves you.Jason & Clairehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00995301136181702869noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1205994137019872196.post-42498546041380106202010-10-23T20:56:16.693-07:002010-10-23T20:56:16.693-07:00Hi Carol. I just want you to know that I have bee...Hi Carol. I just want you to know that I have been thinking of you. What a difficult memory you have shared. I know this must be painful to think about and share. I agree with your friend, Kathy Jo, in that sharing your dad with your kids and allowing them to see you sad will bring you closer. I have seen that this past summer. It is amazing how comforting the simple words of a child are.<br /><br />And I love what your friend Linde said-- "I know he would be so proud of you. Someday you will have your dad back and so until then I say hold on to those wonderful memories." What a beautiful way to keep hope and remember that lives are not over when we think they are. <br /> <br />I have a family member who decided to take his own life too. I was talking about it with a Professor at school and he was a former dance therapist. He wanted me to know that people who do this are severely depressed and in pain-- more that most can understand. This was very helpful to me because of the common claim that those who take their own lives are selfish. I don't believe it is that simple. <br /><br />Yes, your dad loves you. I'm sure of it too. I know he is proud of you right now. And when you see him again you will be able to have the conversations you have missed having.<br /><br />I love you, Carol.Cammiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15914443255616731729noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1205994137019872196.post-29737911983841261392010-10-21T21:08:50.193-07:002010-10-21T21:08:50.193-07:00Wow, what a hard thing to have to share. I am so ...Wow, what a hard thing to have to share. I am so sorry that your dad chose to leave you. I don't think we ever get over losing a parent. I can relate. My mother died 10 years ago (at Christmas, an ocean away from me). My father and I have always had a very strained relationship that only got worse when my mom died. Now, I have no one. My dad is still around, but has nothing to do with me or my family (he only lives 20 minutes away from us). Only my oldest dd remembers him, the younger two don't know who he is. I still grieve the fact that I have no one. I feel like an orphan, even though he's still around. I don't think about it often, but when I do the tears aren't usually far behind. So, believe me, I feel your pain. Thanks for trusting us with this part of your story. May you feel more at peace with it, now that you've opened up about it.Sherrihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13821253282967094450noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1205994137019872196.post-27658995223207144032010-10-21T16:30:26.294-07:002010-10-21T16:30:26.294-07:00I miss my dad too. I am feel your pain. We have so...I miss my dad too. I am feel your pain. We have something in comon. We both lost our fathers when the kids were really young. You had Nate and I had Becky, and Brandon was a baby. You had just told us you were expecting # 2. Father's Day is really had for me too. I try to make it special for my husband because he is a father too. It is just hard to let some things go. I still dream that he is alive and then I wake up to the reality that he is gone. I am thanful for the gospel to know that I can see him again somday and you can see your father again too.Stephaniehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15507612519728581116noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1205994137019872196.post-3584555103297318602010-10-21T14:55:58.718-07:002010-10-21T14:55:58.718-07:00I'm proud of you for sharing. That was very br...I'm proud of you for sharing. That was very brave. I had no idea. I always sensed that it was something that you weren't willing to share because you had often mentioned he has passed but never any other details. I never wanted to pry, because it wasn't my business.<br />The whole thing makes me sad for all of you. You'll probably never know the whys, but you're lucky that you do have good memories of him that helped you be the person you are today. It hurts the most when the ones we love the most hurt us. No matter what was going on with him, he loved you, I'm sure of it.Heatherhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02379616968806586281noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1205994137019872196.post-62652638461085045602010-10-21T13:10:06.154-07:002010-10-21T13:10:06.154-07:00I'm glad you shared. I hope it makes you feel ...I'm glad you shared. I hope it makes you feel a little better to have it off your chest. Hopefully, you can look back and read this often, and start to heal a little. Some wounds never heal all the way, though. Love ya!Kirstenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03643605205139098681noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1205994137019872196.post-806085783380646272010-10-21T12:36:05.565-07:002010-10-21T12:36:05.565-07:00I am so glad that you wrote this. It feels to me ...I am so glad that you wrote this. It feels to me like no one will talk about him. When we do go to the grave it is a very big ordeal. Matt cannot get over it and still cannot make sense of it. It would be good for you guys to talk more about it. I know that he feels very robbed in life of that father and grandfather for his kids. He goes to my Dad for everything that he should be able to go to his Dad for. It is something that I am not sure that we have handled very well. I will never know how deep his pain is until I loose my Dad. So it is very hard to know how to help. I loved your Dad and cherish the few moments that we had with him in life. Life can be too short and he reminds us all the time to live life to the fullest. When you feel like this give Matt a call it would be good for both of you. Love you!!!!slingwallhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10890975138307883799noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1205994137019872196.post-276619868381659132010-10-21T08:01:35.382-07:002010-10-21T08:01:35.382-07:00Oh Carol! I knew he was gone but I didn't KNOW...Oh Carol! I knew he was gone but I didn't KNOW. Thanks for sharing. I can't imagine how you feel now or how you have felt for so long. I know he would be so proud of you. Someday you will have your dad back and so until then I say hold on to those wonderful memories.Lindehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02893479414512274372noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1205994137019872196.post-38690304666827032732010-10-21T06:14:25.558-07:002010-10-21T06:14:25.558-07:00Has it been 11 years?? Thanks so much for sharing...Has it been 11 years?? Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts. It reminded me that my blog is more of a diary for my family and I need to share more here for them to have. And I think you should tell your children about your dad and even let them see you sad. Let them help comfort you. It will bond your family even more.Kathy Johttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00190745647379663564noreply@blogger.com