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Friday, August 6, 2010

Seriously!?!

So I had my big appointment yesterday.
Before I get into all the nitty gritty of that, I'm gonna tell you what happened in the middle of all that nitty gritty!

Doug and I have just started talking to the Dr. listening to all her explanations of my test...waiting on pins and needles for her to spit out the dreaded words.

My phone starts ringing and I ignore it.
It rings again. Ignore it.
Doug's phone rings, it's the office, he ignores it.
It rings again.
I said answer it already.

He does and steps out of the room.
I keep talking to the dr.
He comes back in for a minute as the Dr. decides to move me into another room.
Next thing I know he says he has to leave right now!

What?????
He said to call him when I'm done.
Excuse me????????????

So I do and he's racing back to the other side of town to pick up Kristen at school cause apparently she passed out outside and fell and split open her chin. She needs stitches.

Seriously.

So I race back to meet up with them at quick care.
The poor thing did a doozy on her chin and had to have 5 stitches. She missed the rest of the last day at school and got blood all over her pretty little outfit she had dressed up in. :( It was heartbreaking. She's never done anything like this before and she's like me....a big fat chicken. But she survived the ordeal and feels like a new woman. I told her this was the bravest thing she'd ever done. She was proud of herself and seems to have some new found strength.

It wasn't until mid afternoon that I was even able to talk to Doug about everything the dr. said.

Which was this...we don't know.

Honestly, I went into the appointment braced for her to say it was MS. She had told us this 5 weeks ago after my brain scan came back bad. I've spent the last 5 weeks trying to accept the fact that this is what it would probably be. I have been tortured by it. Through both prayer and blessings we have both felt like this would be the outcome. I was certain. So for her to say she wasn't sure. Was kinda shocking. A good shocking, but still unexpected. The spinal tap was supposed to confirm it. It did and it didn't. The symptoms are their, but there are not enough of them. She thinks we are too early in the diagnosis to meet the criteria.

So this is the plan. We will re-do the MRI of my brain in October to see if there are any new lesions. Next week we are doing a round of MS treatments to see if it helps my symptoms. If it helps, that means we are treating the right thing. They are IV treatments that I have to do 3 days in a row. Get hooked up and hang out while it drips into me for an hour.

I have another dr. out of state (through my mom ;) who is also looking at my test results and basically he thinks the dr. here...is crazy. He thinks I need to see a specialists and have MS ruled out.

Basically I've been told I have carpel tunnel, MS, not MS, lupus, nothing...etc. etc.
Either way, I have test that are coming back bad and that cannot be denied.
I am confused and don't know what to think at this point.
My dr. here is still pretty certain that we are looking at MS. Only time will tell at this point.

During all the testing I've had done they found a mass on my liver.
Seriously, were we adding cancer to the list????
I had to have an ultrasound and ct scan on that to rule out a tumor.
It's a benign mass that I'm not to worry about.
Thank you very much!

********************************************************************

I'm feeling like I'm the brunt of someones sick joke on my life.
I'm over it.
I'm feeling good today and will just try to move on and not worry to much about everything right now. For what ever reason it is not time to have this resolved.
I'm definitely going to just have to trust in the Lords timing and I'm sure someday I will look back at all this and realize why things happened they way they did.

Someday.

Thanks so much for all the calls and thoughts that have been coming my way.
It means the world to me.

Love
Carol

8 comments:

Jen@eighteen25 said...

oh my goodness... poor kristen. getting stitches is not fun. and it's really not fun watching your scared kid get them. what a crappy day you had. i'm so glad to hear that you have a positive outlook. and great faith!

Leslie said...

Kristen's passing out is testament to the evil of year round school! Too hot for those punkins to be outside!! So glad you're nine months next year! You are so amazingly strong and positive. I envy that ability! We love you and you're in our prayers.

Linde said...

You poor thing! How frustrating! I really hope they figure you out. Poor Kristen too! What the crap. What a bad day.You are in my prayers and thoughts. Keep posting your updates:)

Jason & Claire said...

Seriously?!? Kristen had to go through all that on the same day as your appointment? And it was her last day...poor thing. It's sweet that you told her how brave she was.

Carol, I don't know how you're handling all this. I can't believe how positive and faithful you're being. I kept seeing you at church yesterday and I just wanted to go up to you and give you a big hug. I'm sorry. You've definitely been in my thoughts and prayers lately.

Cammie said...

. . .yes, Carol, you are amazing and I am so glad we are in the same family!

And after all that you hosted us at your house and were so very kind. Thank you, thank you. I hope you are feeling OK and that Kristen in healing as well. It is so nice to talk with you and catch up each time we get together. I wish we lived closer.

My kids love your kids.

Jess said...

I'm glad Kristen is okay, but wow, what a day for you guys!
You are such an example to me of strength and faith! You are handling things so well. You are in my thoughts and prayers.

Aussie TM5 Thermomixer said...

Hi Carol, just catching up on what's been happening for you. I am so sorry to hear this. I know it's easy for me to say, but please stay positive throughout this. Poor Kristen too. Hope she is feeling better. You are in my thoughts, Carol.

Wendy said...

i cannot even pretend to know what u r going through...but i am thinking off you and keeping my fingers crossed.xxxx