Monday, March 19, 2012

It was my birthday, shout hurray.

I had a birthday, not that long ago.
I turned......old.

Wanna see.....

This my friends, is the face of 40.
And I've decided I'm like, totally ok with that!
Phew......that's good to get off my chest.

I've allllllwwwwwwaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyysssssssss dreaded turning 40.
It has represented OLD to me.
Heck, I remember when my dad turned 40 and his sisters and my mom threw him a big party.  Everything was black, his cake was a tombstone....I mean come.on. What else was I supposed to take from that mind blowing death inspired party!!!!

So when 40 was knocking on my door I was heading for the hills.......i did not want to give up my 30's.  Heck, I hadn't wanted to give up my 20's!!!!

But it came and went and nothing earth shattering happened. 

I guess it's ok.
I mean I still feel like the same person.  Though I've decided that being mature and wise and knowledgeable is SOOO overated and it's just never gonna happen.

And I'm happy.
Which is saying a lot.
Life has taught me loooooottttttsssss of lessons.  I mean lots.
And a lot of them have been jam packed into the last few years. 
I was seriously getting over it...big time.

And when I thought I really could.not.take.it.any.more.....I took it a little more and than miracles happened.  And I was reminded that Heavenly Father knows who I am and he IS watching out for me.    Which was another good lesson.  I don't love the things I've been through but I can see how they've changed me and helped me and made me be more who I need to be.  And for that I am grateful.

I am happy.
I'm learning that to be happy doesn't mean that life is just cheeky.
But I have been blessed with EVERYTHING that I ever wanted.
And I mean everything.
But life is going to throw me more punches....that, I have accepted!
It's just the way it is and I need to learn to be happy and grateful despite it all.
Things here are temporary and I need to prove myself worthy of it all.
In the end it's all going to be grand.

That doesn't mean I won't whine and complain here and there....I'm certain I will!!!
Maybe if I can be strong and prove that I've learned some lessons I won't need so many more lessons in the future.....a girl can dream right!

Oh and I also cut my hair.  
I was living in a fantasy world with that long mess!
You guys probably never really saw it cause it was in a pony tail 98% of the time.

Here's to being 40 and being ok with it!
oh, and it doesn't hurt that I was totally surprised with a little birthday bash with a gaggle of girls that I love and adore......I mean that makes any birthday awesome!


Lizzy Hill said...

Go Girl! Glad 40 wasn't the 'biggy' you thought it was going to be....I'm about to turn 50. YUCK. Never, ever worried about b'days before [not even 40!!!] but I am NOT, not one bit looking forward to 50. Enjoy the next 10 years ~ they were the bestest I ever had & I'm wishing they will be great years for you too:):):) Oh, and HB:):):)

Danielle said...

Love your story and that photo is soo cute, girl!!
Don't mind the number, you're still fabulous!

Sherri said...

Sweet post Carol. I think 40 has gotten younger in the past 10/20 years. It use to be "it's all downhill from here". Now it's 40 and fabulous! And that you are my friend!

Mary Ann Jenkins said...

Hi Carol!!
I've been racking my brain to figure out whos blog I saw a cute little banner on...I finally just figured it out this afternoon...YOURS!!
Take a look at this fun banner I made, inspired by yours :)

Thanks for the inspiration!!
Mary Ann

Jessy Christopher said...

Carol, thanks for sharing your thoughts and it is really awesome that you speak ur heart out! You look great!

Zarah said...

HAPPY belated, darling!! You are a beautiful fourty year old, classy lady and I wish that I (at 32, currently) looked half as good.
Besides, you're totally gorjuss on the inside, too! :D

Rhonda Van Ginkel said...

40 looks amazing on you! Happy Birthday and here's to kicking the pants off of those silly age notions!!!

: )

Cassandra aka Scrap Savvy said...

40 is not old my friend and on you it looks amazingly young! Great read and I am happy that you had an awesome one!All the best!:)

Alex said...

I really enjoyed reading your thoughts. I had the same panic attack last year when I turned 30, just to realize the same thing as you did - I am happy. I am sure I am going to go through exactly the same thing when I turn 40 as well. You just never get used to the fact that the time is flying by... maybe simply because you are busy living your beautiful life, creating your beautiful memories, creating your happiness. And then just swooooosh +10 years :D

You are one amazing 40 year young woman!